The Holiday Blues: Breaking Down Emotional Loneliness and Self-Criticism

Jingle bell rock...bottom? The hype around Christmas can bring about some complex feelings. While it can be exciting to spend time with friends and family, this time of year can also come with a lot of pressure. Festive fatigue is real. With the added stress of planning and meeting expectations, trying to plan over the festive season can take a toll. And as the new year approaches, many of us feel pressured to set new year resolutions and make promises to ourselves, which can be overwhelming. If you're feeling down this time of year, you're not alone. Here are some strategies to help ease the end-of-year blues:

1. Connect and Contribute

When loneliness strikes, you may feel tempted to retreat and isolate yourself. However, this can increase feelings of disconnection. You might begin having negative thoughts like “I’m a burden to others” or “nobody cares”, making you feel even more depressed. It’s important to remember, not everything we think is true. So, what do you do about it? A common strategy spoken about in therapy is ‘opposite action’ and this can be implemented when the urge to withdraw hits. Firstly, identify the urge to withdraw is often driven by your sadness and then commit to a new action - an action of connection. Reach out to a friend, participate in volunteer work, or simply be a listening ear to someone. Helping and connecting with others can increase feelings of connection and community, and get you out of your own head.

2. Give Thanks

Gratitude goes a long way! Take time to reflect on the things you're thankful for, no matter how small they may seem. Research shows that practicing gratitude not only boosts a positive mood, but also reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression. Try writing down three things you're grateful for each day, or share them with a friend or loved one.

Some ideas to get you started:

- What's one good thing that happened today?

- Who is someone you're thankful for, and why?

- What's a challenge you overcame, and what did you learn from it?

3. Give Light to Your Progress

It's easy to get caught up in what we haven't achieved, but take a moment to acknowledge your accomplishments. Feelings of disappointment can be indicators that you want more for yourself, and that's okay. Instead of dwelling on what's in the past, ask yourself:

- What did I learn this year?

- How can I apply these learnings to help me work towards my goals?

- What small things did I do well that I want to keep doing?

By focusing on progress, not perfection, you can cultivate a more compassionate and growth-oriented mindset.

The holiday season can be a challenging time, but you’re not alone in feeling overwhelmed and lonely. By using the strategies above, you can shift your perspective and find more joy in the festive season. Here’s to a hopeful new year!